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Archive for September, 2011

On being a Mom – 2

To follow schedule or let go, is the question. For the most part, I control Nan’s schedule, thereby the entire household’s schedule. I know for a fact that not following schedule leads to meltdowns. To list two of Nan’s BIG meltdowns:
#1 – On the train while returning from NYC to New Jersey
#2 – Dinner time at Buckhorn Lake
The meltdowns lasted 15 minutes and they came on because we (sharply) deviated off her nap schedule.

But if I put the 15 minute meltdowns on a scale and weigh them against the fun we had at NYC or Buckhorn Lake last weekend, the obvious choice would be the fun, deviating off schedules.

To Nan’s credit, she has behaved wonderfully on our trips out of town. I was listing the cities we have visited with her for her daycare project (yes! “All about me!” project!). We have visited Atlanta, twice, via road, Florida, Gatlinburg, New Jersey/New York and more recently Buckhorn Last State park. Not bad for a 20 month old, huh?

Yet, between Sunday night and Friday morning, I am all about following schedule for myself, and Nan, and thereby the mister. . I have known to be quite unwavering, even when I was at home with Nan and did not really have to report to work.

Sometimes I am envious of those mom’s who don’t follow any schedule for their babies and yet have happy babies. Something tells me that any mom will be successful at it if they try it. On the other hand, when I see mom’s who don’t step outside the house when it is their child’s lunch time, I feel glad that I am beyond that restriction.

I have seen myself growing as a mommy! From being extra careful with the little one till she was six months old, to choosing not to (over)medicate her for an ear infection. Some choices work well, some not so much! As of now I am glad I have the control (or so I think) of when to make the choice of following schedule or deviating off it. I’ll take it, as I learn newer and exciting things about being a mom.

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Travel time

Reading this post from The Hindu, reminded me of my daily travel from Andheri (West) to TTC (Vashi). On paper, the journey was an hour and fifteen minutes. It probably took us around that much time (give or take ten minutes) in the morning. But on the way back, through the polluted and crowded highways of Mumbai, not to forget construction work, it took us as much as two and a half hours (give or take ten minutes). So what do you do with so much time? Well, you build relations for life, you speak your heart out to someone, you play cards, you scream if someone cheats at a game, you laugh and much more!

I traveled for a year in this manner. For the first part of the year, I used to sit with U, a friend from my neighborhood who I grew really close to, in those three to four months. (I think people would wonder if we were sisters) Towards the beginning of November, U had to leave for a posting to the United States, and thus started a new chapter in my life. I met five of the most wonderful people I have known. It is sad that I am in touch with just one of them (Rash), but I am glad that Facebook provides me with that opportunity.

I remember very clearly, there used to be a bus that would leave at 5.45PM and another one at 8PM. We would delay our departure, if the other members of the group could not make it for the bus at 5.45PM. We would play “Bridge”, one of the smartest card games that there is. The best part of the game is that it is played with two teams and hence the superb camaraderie in the group. We would have a terrific time, picking the perfect partners, bidding for a win, playing the game and screaming if someone from the opposite team cheated. Many a times we drew a stern look from someone, who might have been sleeping, to keep it quiet, but I don’t think it ever deterred our spirits. We would even have sufficient energy to eat some snacks at the Merwan’s cake shop or Thakkar, before we headed our individual ways.

Life was fun back then! Super simple too! When I look back, I wonder if would I have been able to carry out this three hour plus journey every single day, and take care of a baby? Perhaps not! But that is what carefree youth is for! Cheers to all my friends, wherever you are, whatever you are doing, I hope you remember me once in a while, like I do!

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